I think the first step in becoming a good player is to realize what a game backgammon is. Many people think they're unlucky when they lose, and don't realize that it is actually also a game of skill. The first thing I learned from backgammon was to lose, even from the most incredible positions. You shouldn't spend your energy crying about your bad rolls, spend it on making good moves instead. Always play backgammon for affordable but meaningful stakes. If you play only for fun you'll take doubles "to see how they'll turn out" and win some of those games anyway, giving yourself incorrect reinforcement. Other than that, it's simple to describe how to become a good backgammon player, study and read as many books you can get your hand on. If you go to a club or a tournament, watch the players and try to learn. Also, don't be afraid to ask good players questions about a move he made. While I'd agree that watching good players is a useful part of learning, I doubt that there is any substitute for playing many many games. Most really strong players are people who spend many hours at a real backgammon table, playing for money both heads up & in chouette. Reading good books can help a great deal, but the knowledge in them doesn't really become "your own" until you have put it into uses over the course of hundreds/thousands of games.

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Good Luck!